Words by Allan Sherman Music from Ponchielli's "Dance of the Hours" from La Gioconda Recorded by Allan Sherman, 1963 A E Hello, Muddah! Hello, Fadduh! E E7 A Here I am at Camp Granada. A C#7 D Camp is very entertaining, D E E7 A And they say we'll have some fun if it stops raining. A E I went hiking with Joe Spivy. E E7 A He developed poison ivy. A C#7 D You remember Leonard Skinner? D E E7 A He got ptomaine poisoning last night after dinner. A E All the counselors hate the waiters. E E7 A And the lake has alligators. A C#7 D And the head coach wants no sissies, D E E7 A So he reads to us from something called Ulysses. A E Now I don't want this to scare ya, E E7 A But my bunk mate has malaria. A C#7 D You remember Jeffrey Hardy? D E E7 A They're about to organize a searching party. Ref F#m C#7 Take me home.Oh Muddah, Fadduh, F#m C#7 Take me home.I hate Granada. Bm7 D A F#m D Bm Don't leave me out in the forest where, I might Bm C#7 Get eaten by a bear. F#m C#7 Take me home. C#7 F#m C#7 I promise I will not make noise, C#7 Bm7 D A Or mess the house with oth - er boys. A F#m D Oh, please don't make me stay, D Bm7 C#7 D7 C#7 I've been here one whole day. A E Dearest Fadduh, Darling Muddah, E E7 A How's my precious, little bruddah? A C#7 D Let me come home if you miss me. D E E7 A I would even let Aunt Bertha hug and kiss me! A E Wait a minute!It's stopped hailing. E E7 A Guys are swimming.Guys are sailing. A C#7 D Playing baseball.Gee! That's bettah D E E7 A Muddah, Fadduh, kindly disregard this letter!